Call it a see-saw, a zig-zag, or a journey of ups and downs.
Living with multiple sclerosis can be any of those things. The MS MonSter rages
and rests, especially for those of us who battle Relapse-Remitting MS (RRMS).
(For more information, read Reviewing
the four types of multiple sclerosis.)
Honestly, sometimes I feel like toasting, but other times I’m
just toast. On some days, I have enough wherewithal to accomplish a whole lot.
On others, I’m almost crying “Uncle” from the get-go.
Created by this user with public domain photos |
Maybe you know the feeling.
That’s how MS is.
After nearly a decade of personal war against this chronic
neurological condition, I often think I ought to be more adept at predicting
the battles. But I’m not. The MS MonSter doesn’t telegraph his attacks. He
simply strikes.
Sure, sometimes I overdo it, pushing my own limits on my
best days. Isn’t that pretty common among MSers? We’re so thrilled to feel
less-than-bad that we find extra energy. So we do more and more and more. We
find ourselves asking, “Gee, is this how the rest of the world feels all the
time?”
Pain-free moments are
amazing!
Days when our balance and muscle obedience and vision and
other faculties perform satisfactorily bring us joy and motivation to get up
and go.
So we go and go and
go … until we stop.
I’ve done it again.
Recently I spent a wonderful high-energy weekend with some
friends. We stayed up late each night. We arose early each morning for
activity-filled days. We ate snacks and desserts and extra-rich foods. We
talked and laughed and sang. It was a blast.
But it took me almost a week to recover. I sacked out early
for several nights in a row, after returning home.
The next weekend, I ran in a 5K. I met my current usual
running pace and received a place medal in my age division.
I felt like toasting.
But the next day, I was toast. Totally spent.
After all these years with MS, I still find that a little baffling and bewildering. I routinely run farther than a 5K. But the race knocked me out. Maybe it was the winter weather we faced, including running in gusty winds. Perhaps the excitement drained my energy, although I sure enjoyed it at the time. I may have experienced an adrenaline drop when it was over. And I was probably still somewhat fatigued from the previous weekend’s festivities. (It’s all about pacing, when you live with MS.)
After all these years with MS, I still find that a little baffling and bewildering. I routinely run farther than a 5K. But the race knocked me out. Maybe it was the winter weather we faced, including running in gusty winds. Perhaps the excitement drained my energy, although I sure enjoyed it at the time. I may have experienced an adrenaline drop when it was over. And I was probably still somewhat fatigued from the previous weekend’s festivities. (It’s all about pacing, when you live with MS.)
Clearly, the MS MonSter recognized my vulnerability to an
onslaught at that time.
But I’ll be back.
You are invited to join the Kicking
MS to the Curb page on Facebook and the Making the
Most of MS board on Pinterest.
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