Living with multiple sclerosis (or nearly any chronic medical condition) can feel a lot like listening to a skipping record.
Vinyl records are making a comeback, but I sure hope someone has engineered a way to make songs stop skipping. If you’re been around awhile, you may recall the frustration of hearing a song stop mid-phrase and repeat the same measure or two, again and again, until somebody got up and moved the needle forward on the record.
Why did records skip?
Usually, the culprit was dust or dirt on the surface of the vinyl record. Sometimes a scratch in the record’s groove caused it. At other times, the arm of the record player needed rebalancing, or the needle had to be replaced.
Hmm. I think there are a few lessons to be found – at least, for me. Maybe for you too! Dust and dirt are clutter. Scratching is damage. Lack of balance is a challenge as well. Maybe these factors combine to make life with MS seem like a skipping record sometimes – when the same annoying symptoms crop up again and again and again.
How can we stop the skipping soundtrack to beat back the MS beast?
Sure, we cannot eliminate an MS diagnosis and the struggles that go with it – until a cure is found. But we can equip ourselves to battle it as mightily as possible. Here are some statements of strength that I’ve found helpful. Perhaps they will inspire others, as we take on the MS MonSter in our own daily lives.
- Acceptance is authoritative.
This is critical, but it’s a tough step. Coming to terms with the reality of owning up to having an as-yet incurable chronic and potentially disabling medical condition is very hard. But accepting this truth helps us to step up to the proverbial plate and slug it out each day, even with MS throws its weirdest hard balls our way.
There’s a reason people refer to MSers as warriors. Ask any of us, and you’ll hear some vivid stories.
Consider the name of this website, Kicking MS to the Curb. There are days when MS kicks me – not just to the curb, but out into the middle of traffic. It happens. But with everything I have, I want to take authority over the dreaded MonSter, retaking ownership of my own life, right in the face of strange symptoms.
Stop me, if you’ve heard this: I have MS, but MS doesn‘t have me.
- Gratitude is empowering.
This is true for anyone facing down any form of difficulty. Even if our vision fails, can we spot something for which we are thankful? Gratitude changes the channel, switching our focus from our struggles to something more satisfying, even for a little while.
Little and large points of appreciation can come from unexpected places,
such as:
- a delicious snack that doesn’t trigger any symptoms
- a flare-up that waits till after an important event
- an encouraging phone call from a friend
- a long-lasting symptom that finally abates
- a few moments outside on a mild day
- an appointment suddenly canceled, leaving newfound time for rest
- a cozy reading time with a warm blanket, fresh from the dryer
- an MS scan that shows no new changes
It’s all about perspective. We are boosted when we notice.
- Hope is helpful.
It’s easy to fall into the cancellation rut, living with such a tiring condition. And it’s hard to commit to repeating responsibilities or plans. How do we know how we might feel on such-and-such a day? The what-ifs can be even more crippling than our actual symptoms.
Most of us find that we have to educate our friends and loved ones about MS, at least enough that they can understand when we bow out of plans (often at the last minute). But isn’t that better than not making plans at all?
A teacher I have long respected, who carried a chronically disabling
condition for his entire adult life, used to offer this advice repeatedly
(almost like a mantra):
Don’t skip the plans, even if you end up having to skip the event.
He knew that anticipation was worth plenty. Maybe we all need to look forward to something. So we go ahead and fill in our calendars (even if we clutter them less than we used to do), and hope for the best. Yes, we learn to balance busy and idle, and we might aim for lighter schedules. But we still make some plans.
Then we hope for good MS days, rather than bad ones.
- Attitudes add up.
I only knew one grandfather, when I was growing up. Folks called him Tiger, because he was such a fighter. He wasn’t angry or contentious. He didn’t pick fights. But he fought back when life was hard. When his health failed, he fought even harder. His attitude was upbeat, even when his body felt beaten down. He enjoyed his life, despite difficulties.
That’s a lesson. Many of us haven’t fully learned that yet, but we want that spunk.
- Platitudes are pointless.
Every one of these statements only rings true when we preach them to ourselves. When someone else parrots them at us, then they are mere platitudes. That feels like we’re being shut down, instead of supported. And that helps no one.
But when we learn (often the hard way) how mighty our mindsets can be, then we become much more than the medical condition with which we contend. That’s how we stop the skipping record, or maybe just stop the sound from getting under our skin. Sure, we cannot stop the symptoms, as MS stages yet another onslaught. But we grow stronger in spirit, so we can rise (even figuratively) to do as much as we can for as long as we can.
Maybe that’s all anyone can ask for. Let’s play that tune again … and again … and again.
Related items:
- Can infirmity be a blessing?
- Hold on! Having MS, I'm thankful for ...
- Is there glory in enduring MS?
- Life with MS: Sometimes you feel like toasting, but other times you're just toast.
- Maybe MS has taught me something, after all.
- MS makes me wanna cheer anyone struggling to exercise
- Stress brings MS to excess
- You have MS? I know someone who has that.
Image/s: Adapted from public domain image.
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